Nov 5, 2012

what loss is

We as Humans think of losses predominantly in material terms. But, actually coming to analyze it- the term 'loss' in it's true sense is the dark void or an absolute absence of living, responding, emotive humans and other creatures; the presence of their absence is LOSS. nothing less.


""It is curious how sometimes the memory of death lives on for so much longer than the memory of the life that it purloined. " - A. Roy

I remember him from the time I was able to differentiate the knolls and dells of relationships, the 'who-is-whos' and 'what-is-whats' of life; and I am to remember him for the rest of my life to come. Just that he left us all too soon into oblivion when we expected him the least to go.
My uncle, Valichan, as I call him, Dad's elder brother (and his only brother) moved away from us, injecting a deep sorrow within the entire family, a void which we find so hard to live with, move on, or fill.

For years of summer holidays, or just generally, holidays as such, when we went to his place, he'd be the active one, mingling with little kids with ease, the jolly man who cracked jokes, the one who towered ice-cream scoops into each kid's bowl, the knowledgeable who shared nuances of languages and life's lessons to people around - the one anyone could approach and be friends with. I truly mean it when I say, 'be friends with'.

pic courtesy : Krishna kumar

His Life began as early as 15 when he joined the Indian Army, serving the nation at such a tender age; at an age when one is supposed to HAVE DREAMS. When people with such high experiences in his/ her tender life usually have harder exteriors, my Valichan never let go his sense of humour and readiness to enjoy life. That probably explains the reason for the enormous number of people who came over to pay homage at his last rites. 

For me, its a deep regret within myself having not talked to him or spent time when I could have, not having visited him, sat next to him to share my limited knowledge, having an excuse of no time to have inquired about his worsened illness, his pain. Most of all, never having complimented for his deep dimples and the heart warming smile. And now, who is going to read my apology?

I miss him.

But then, he is there, sleeping on his bed; only now, with no more pains or chemo therapies, just with the prayers and love of a lot of souls he had wanted to be with. He is just taking a nap - away from his agony and illness. 

That's a belief.


Wellwisher said...

RIP sir! :)

xyzandme said...

But this was the last thing I wanted to read.